Day 391: Calm and I Matter

Personal process. Writing from: How Calm is here.

Looking at the point of simply being in a quiet moment, with me: that moment in itself.

I mean that since I have to deliberately make this space that aligns with the words ‘simply being in a quiet moment with me’, how I live these words sets a starting point of who I am in ‘simply being in a ‘quiet’ ‘moment’ ‘with’ ’me’. Quiet and Moment I had opened up, and walked to some extent, and I had found that a quality of ‘with’ had changed in redefining Care; somehow I’d opened up for me a deeper self intimacy. It was only through this change that I could see how the old ‘with’ that I had previously lived had been conditional.

In recognizing the creative nature of being, in a world of real-time change, then what I’d want for me as for all, in recognizing and then equalizing with these words, is living access to this ‘simply being in a quiet moment with me’ moment of a life, as a part of every breath. And so to walk the practice of this, to clear the starting point again, to walk it eventually into every breath.


This point about an unseen conditionality of ‘with’ as it existed in my mind came up again for me, in a different light, in the latest in the Reptilian series on Eqafe. Listening to the recording of Anu’s recent spoken words – through the Portal – in Purpose Has Left the Building, continuing into I MATTER – listening, and hearing newly, the words in the question, “How do I matter to me?” I mean, writing here of how it was for me in hearing this: the question came across to me in a direct simplicity that previously I had not opened myself up to.


And so in hearing how these words could be, how they could exist for me, spoken directly, I saw also at the same time a perspective of how I had lodged objection and obstruction to my own simplicity of the question, and so within that how I had been unable to ask myself such a thing directly, kind of being within and as a character of objection around the relationship of who I am to I Matter, and so seeing for a moment ‘all of that’ accumulate into a consequence of having no access to this question in its simple form of words direct.


So here for me also a release in hearing these words expressed in clarity, and points about reception of words, and of discovering the personal interferences in reception of words. By ‘all of that’, I mean, all that would constitute this mattering to me, in terms of self worth, self recognition, self appreciation, self acceptance, self honoring, where ‘all of that’ would be where I’m at with me in all these specific points within me, that together form this familiar feel of me as what comes up in me in response to: How I Matter.


Practical in I MATTER:

Sounding the words I Matter and getting a reference of where you are at with you




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