Day 211: Wonder
Is this question of my wonderment relevant to this world and how we exist or not?
This question itself should be affixed somehow above the entrance to my wonder – but how to really do this. Okay so, ‘Entrance’. Immediately a word arrives at hand that I need to look within. I am showing myself that I need to define my wonder so as to align it with reality. And the ‘passage’ of this wonderment in my mind is from one word to another, and so here is a beginning.
1) Entrance: noun: an opening, such as a door, passage, or gate, that allows access to a place.
2) Entrance: verb: fill (someone) with wonder and delight, holding their entire attention.
Here within this word that I have chosen to represent the entry of a question, the beginning of an investigation of some kind – I show myself immediately the choice between the experience in my mind of ‘questioning’, as a source of ‘delight’, or as the passive recipient of some energy ‘story’ – and the choice of directing myself in deliberate investigation. It is clear that living this word ‘entrance’ as both the noun and the verb confused I cannot stay aligned with the physical reality, responsible for my question, because I am partially aligned with energy and the temptations or enticements of entertainments in my mind.
The thing is that I did not know that I was about to write this. It had not been written and prepared already in my mind – except the point raised in the first line which was a point raised by Bernard – for which I was grateful because it seemed to me like a key of assistance and support in the endeavor of real investigation – so I take ‘structure’ here not as a prescribed plan that exists separate from me, but as the structure or the path direction of this walk developing as I stay present in the words I write.
There are two fears here: 1) The fear of spinning off into the mind-world. And 2) The fear of following a prescribed structure that I do not fully understand. To align myself with a group that aligns itself with physical reality, it is natural that I would wish my writings to be in accord and cross-referencable with theirs, and there is a source of fear, that to write like ‘this’ or to write like ‘that’, would be to lose the only structure that I trust, which is me being here writing this as I write it. To align myself with a group that aligns itself with physical reality and how to change the physical reality so that it is best for all, I have to align myself and stay aligned with my own physical reality here. Cross reference and therefore stabilization and consistency in an imaginary world is impossible.
I commit myself to develop my writing skills in the course of my writing practice so as to give myself more choice in the overall form in which I write while staying with me here in breath in awareness of my alignment with the physical reality, the single purpose direction and endeavor of the Desteni Group together and as one to synchronize with the voice of life itself in the expression of the actual real normality of equality and oneness.
I commit myself to the gentleness and patience that is in the expression of my living breath, to turn myself, to move myself into alignment with the physical reality.
I commit myself to accustomize myself to this for me new-found reality of this Existence as the manifestation of the living word, and within that to develop my realization of my responsibility within and as the words I use, transmit, accept allow within myself.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to connect a positive energy experience to the word ‘wonder’, within which I have accepted and allowed myself to create systems of wavering as ‘wandering’ directionless ‘entranced’ and mesmerized within my mind, through which my questions of this world and this reality have been answered only as an experience of me for me and about me in my mind. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed my ‘entrance’ into a question or investigation to be conditioned by this word ‘entrance’ through which unknowingly I have accepted and allowed myself to give permission or ‘passage’ to myself to be drawn into the mind, and away from the physical reality here, the source of real solutions for the world.
I commit myself to make my questions of myself and of my world Real, related to reality. I dedicate my wonder to the establishment of what is best for all.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear ‘spinning off into the mind-world’. Within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define fear as not included in the mind-world. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define fear as real, and to justify it within my utilization of it to protect me from ‘spinning off into the mind-world’, while all the time I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that in alignment with this fear, that I am not already as and in this ‘mind-world’.
I commit myself to see and realise and understand that my fear of ‘spinning off’ is a consequence of not trusting myself in being here in breath, and that the development of this trust and this stability is through practice of the breathing in real space time in which there is no access of the mind as fear, and no temptation of myself to be as mind as fear.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed this ‘wonder’ in my mind as an appropriate response to existence as a whole, and within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become the experience of ‘wonder’ in the face of my own reality as part of this existence in which I see a million questions but do not question who I am within this, and do not see and realise and understand that who I am is who I have accepted and allowed myself to be as an experience of wonder, satisfied by energy, satisfied by resignation in the interpretation of the world as an ‘enigma’ or a ‘mystery’, or as an unanswerable question. Within this I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as an enigma or a mystery in which I have accepted and allowed myself to both justify my resignation from investigating and questioning myself, and exulting in and as a positive experience of energy as who I am.
Follow these online blogs:
Heaven’s Journey To Life: Day 386 The Mind’s Afterlife and the Voices of Memories that Haunt it
Creation’s Journey to Life: Day 400 Paranoia of Intent
7 Year Journey to Life @ Facebook
EQAFE: ‘The Crucifixion of Jesus’, has been a great support to me because hear within these interviews, presented through the Portal, the actual teachings of Jesus, rather than the ones that were to be, after his death, tweaked and twisted into the four approved versions of his life as the Gospels. How the political message of Equality and the reality of Equality and Oneness were skewed into a religious mantra so as to suit the interests of the system.
This series is for a serious student that cares about LIFE and endeavour to understand how creation functions in fact and in specific detail.
The FREE DIP LITE Course available to All – simply sign up and start- http://lite.desteniiprocess.com/ This is a powerful free introduction to real self-exploration, and self realisation using the Desteni tools, with online support. This really is an opportunity of a life time.