Day 155: Do I fight myself or give in?
I am walking the Dimensions of the Postponement Personality ( starting at Day 139 ) and also exploring related points and personalities as they come up along the way.
The postponement personality: some more back chat/internal conversation/double think
With this task/responsibility/commitment before me,
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to enter into/listen to an internal conversation question loop: do I fight myself or give in, do I fight myself or give in, do I fight myself or give in?
I forgive myself that I have not accepted or allowed myself to see that I have become distracted by two conflicting choices, both equally unreal. I stop, I breathe. And it’s as if there is this rush on, that I have to, must, decide right now.
I breathe, I slow myself down. I do not have to put myself into this situation. What is this fear that makes for such a hurry? What is this inferiority that I have accepted and allowed myself to be in both cases, whether I fight or whether I resign? I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to participate in this game of energy.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become so distracted that I am no longer even focused on the task before me but instead I am considering how to manage this energy so that I can feel better about myself.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to consider making a stand against futility in which already I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that this futility is real.
I commit myself to stop these unrealities such as this internal conversation in my mind that I have accepted and allowed myself to live and be directed by.
I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give such power away to these scripts that I have written and compiled that when I see or sense or become aware in some way that the pattern is beginning to unroll, then I go into fear, rather than to stay with myself as breathing here and look at what precisely is this pattern that I have written for and as myself that obviously I now need to change and realign, so that simply I can direct myself and attend instead to physical reality.
continuing next post…
The Quantum Mind
This series is for a serious student that cares about LIFE and endeavour to understand how creation functions in fact in specific details.
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