Day 68: Fear Obscuring Self Awareness

 

While reading out a ‘massively’ (according to my own comparison to me) long shared Self-Forgiveness statement of an other being, I come to a place where I accept and allow my eyes to glaze over. So I stop here to look at this.

 

What am I accepting and allowing in myself that I go somewhere else and shift into distraction in my mind?

 

At the eye-glaze moment, there was a backchat question that went: How can ‘they’ possibly go so far and deeply into this? Which I see now was the reversal of a statement to myself in which I take up the position in myself of an ‘I don’t know’ rejection of self responsibility. So, underneath the question lays the statement of self-judgement, “I can’t do this good enough’’, and underneath this unawareness, fear.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to scroll down others’ Self Forgiveness statements to see how far down they go, and then go into and become this fear that I will never get to the bottom of my own script of energetic code that I have written and subscribed to in myself.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare my process to the process of an other being and then to come up and arrive into as me a measurement of myself as lacking and inferior and then accept myself to be directed by a fear of ‘who I am’, apparently according to my mind, and then return into the old familiar hideout of distraction in my mind.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to look upon my own process in separation from myself in which I take an aerial view in my mind and see a mountain range and vastness, and justified ‘impossibility’ so that I give up on pushing through myself and what I have accepted and allowed.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that in separating me from this process of myself that I have already paved the way to resignation of my commitment to walk this here with me.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to compare me to an other and for within this to have accepted me as competition and as spite and jealousy and fear, in and as which energies I then judge myself and then resign.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize and see and understand that it is this fear that obscures my self awareness, and that it is me that sets the limits on my self.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not push through this fear when I arrive before myself and face this energy of me.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not recognize this fear for what it is and instead to re-confirm this limitation as being the edge of me.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as energy according to my fear.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to live within and as a world of fear.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not realize that a world of fear is a world without awareness.

 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize and understand that in fear of fear I obscure the fear that I am accepting and allowing self to be, and therefore hide my self awareness from myself that I am in this moment fear that I have accepted and allowed myself to be.

 

I commit myself to stop forever this relationship that I have made, accepted and allowed, embellished and absorbed elaborated and inherited and supported in and as myself to fear.

 

I commit myself to this simplicity to walk this process of myself as breath by breath.

 

 

 

See these blogs:

Heaven’s Journey to Life

Creation’s Journey to Life

Earth’s Journey to Life

And other Journey to Life  blogs

Desteni.org

Equalmoney.org

AND…Check the e-bookstore as well as FREE downloads at Eqafe.com

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~ by adamsblogs on June 28, 2012.

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